Pearls of Encouragement for Christian
Article – How does your God esteem compare with
your Self Esteem?
We did it!! We now have over 1,000 women
who have completed the CWM Survey. God is so good
and that number is beyond my wildest dreams. Thank
you so much. Who knows what number we will reach!
You can still fill out the CWM Survey by going to
and click on survey on the home page. I apologize
in advance for the long issue this time. There are
so many different things I want to share with you.
Please take time to read the various announcements
Christian Working Moms are now a focus
of research at a Christian University. Please read
the following announcement and if you qualify send
an email to Kerris to help her with her doctoral research.
Exciting new study – YOU can participate!!
Attention women: You have the opportunity to participate
in some very exciting research that will contribute
to helping other women find fulfillment in balancing
their motherhood and career roles. We are seeking
female participants with a Christian faith perspective
who have completed a Master's, Doctoral, or professional
(e.g., medicine, law) degree in any field of study
and are currently employed with at least one child
under the age of 18 years residing in the home. Participation
would involve completing a short, confidential, and
anonymous online questionnaire. If you fit these criteria,
we would value your input to our study. Please send
an email to Kerris.L.Oates@biola.edu
for complete details on how you can help. Your
participation would be greatly appreciated.
I wanted to tell you about two excellent
books I have read recently and a new innovative witnessing
tool. I have been reading Lost Women of the Bible
by Carolyn Custis James. Carolyn looks at stories
of women in the Bible that we think we know well and
looks at them again with new eyes. Carolyn also shares
that women in the Bible often had a hard time with
the traditional roles of wife and mother. This book
will challenge you to look at a new truly Biblical
and accepting view of women. Click here to read more
about the book.
Many of you know that I am a Marriage
and Family Therapist as well. I am also reading Sacred
Influence by Gary Thomas. I have read many marriage
books over the years and have never quite read one
like this. The subtitle of the book is What a Man
Needs From His Wife to Be the Husband She Wants. Gary
does a good job of explaining what we need to change
as woman, what we can expect from men, and he does
an excellent job of looking at really tough marital
situations. When looking at tough marital problems
he gives examples of women who have walked through
that difficulty and came out on the other side to
victory. You will not find simplistic answers, but
you will find Biblical and God honoring answers to
our marriages. He has also written a book entitled
To look at Sacred Influence click here.
One last thing, thanks for being so
patient with all of the resources listed. My husband
found this resource. Campus Crusade has produced a
mini video CD. It is very small and they call it a
business card. The CD has a presentation of the gospel
and you can even access different languages. You need
to have access to Internet Explorer. The small CD’s
only cost $1.25/each. They are so portable and you
could hand them out very easily. People may be more
interested in a CD and then they could talk with you
later. Here is the link to purchase the CD’s.
The blog has been a little quiet over
the July 4th holiday, but it is still there. I posted
a question entitled Needing Your Help. When you visit
the blog, it may have moved to the left hand side.
I want to know if you would be interested in purchasing
CD’s or Bible Studies that I would develop and
what you would like to see. As always you can post
a comment on any subject you like. Just go to http://kimberlychastain.com/my-journal
Article – How does your God esteem
compare with your Self Esteem?
You cannot open a magazine without seeing
an article on how to improve your self-esteem or how
to improve your child’s self-esteem. Is self-esteem
a biblical concept? Is there anything wrong with wanting
to improve your self-esteem?
I think as a society and as Christians
we are overly obsessed with self-esteem. We come dangerously
close to making self-esteem an idol instead of worshipping
God. You maybe saying, wait a minute doesn’t
God want us to feel good about ourselves? I think
God wants us to view ourselves through his eyes and
not our own eyes or the world’s eyes.
Let’s look at the difference between
the world’s view of self-esteem and how God
views us. The world tells us you can do anything if
you work hard enough and if you believe in yourself.
The world says I am a wonderful person no matter what
I do. We often hear a message from the world that
beauty is really skin deep. Another strong message
from the world is you need to take care of #1, yourself
and do whatever it takes to get to the top. When the
world talks about self-esteem you will often find
your faults minimized. You may not be encouraged to
take an honest look at yourself. How does God see
us and what is God esteem anyway? First, of all God
sees us as the crowning finale to his creation. We
were the last things he created and He said, “It
is good.” I really want you to drink in the
thought that God created you (individually) and said,
it is good!!
Recently, I had a close family member put herself
down and I said, “You are complaining about
God’s creation.” He made you and everything
about you. He loves you just the way you are. God
esteem is very different from self-esteem in that
the focus is on God, the Creator, and not us. When
we get too focused on self-esteem we take our eyes
off of God. We also are not appreciating how God had
made us and why he made us. Why did God make us? He
made us to glorify him in everything we do. Our actions
are to reflect back and give glory to the Creator.
The world often says makes your own
way, you are in charge. God says in Jeremiah 29:11,
“For I know the plans I have for you declares
the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you.”
God knows what you are going to do before it happens.
He knows the day you will die. We often have the illusion
that we are in charge of our lives, but who is really
in charge, God is in charge of every area of our lives.
God esteem differs in that our goal
is to serve others and point them to Christ. That
is very different from self-esteem that is all about
getting your own needs met. God esteem is also about
sanctification. Sanctification is a fancy word that
means as Christians the Holy Spirit is daily making
us more and more like Christ. We will not be perfect,
till we reach heaven, but we are being renewed daily.
Through the sanctification process God works on our
faults and sometimes we have to look at things in
our life that need to be changed. When we allow God
to make a heart change in our lives, then those changes
last. Much different from the world’s self-esteem
changes that feel good for awhile, but will not last
long term. Also, the world often makes excuses for
wrong choices, but we know sin is very real and we
are responsible for our actions.
In conclusion, the problem I see with
self-esteem as defined by the world is the focus is
on us and not God. Truthfully, we should not have
any problems feeling good about ourselves. God sent
his only Son to die for our sins and God loves us
no matter what we do. God created us and said, “It
is good.” Also, God chose us (you individually)
to be his child before the world began. Now, that
is incredible! The more you spend time focusing on
what God has done for you and how much he loves you,
you cannot help but feel good about yourself.(I want
to add one word of caution, I realize, as a therapist,
that sometimes you can be depressed and that can affect
how you view yourself and God. A Christian therapist
can help address that issue more with you.) Spend
time meditating on how God sees you and begin to accept
his view of you and not the world’s.
Is there an unwritten rule that in the
summer, siblings must increase their frustrations
with one another? I guess it is all that time together.
Enjoy navigating sibling rivalry!!!
Till next time,
Kimberly M. Chastain