June 2013 Pearls of Encouragement for CWMs
Welcome
Article – Celebrating Dads
Final Thoughts

 

The Voices of Christian Working Moms

Newly Released Book
written by
Author Kimberly Chastain

Welcome

In the United States it is summer and children are getting out of school. Often that means things are less hectic around home. At least there is no homework to get done every night. Use that extra time to do fun activities with your children or maybe even read a book you have been wanting to read yourself. You can even catch “lightening bugs”. Does anyone remember doing that as a child? Fireflies are the technical term for “lightening bugs”. As a child we would catch them and put them in a jar. We would poke holes in the top of the jar and that would be our nightlight for at least one night. Having fun with your children doesn’t always have to cost money.

Come visit our CWM blog at http://christianworkingmoms.blogspot.com and share what you appreciate about Dads.

Article – Celebrating Dads

In June we celebrate Father’s Day. Do you know the one gift I think most Dads would appreciate and is free? An encouraging word or thanks for all they do. A troubling trend for years in the media has been to make Dads look stupid, irresponsible, and generally clueless. The sitcom I last remember that presented Dads in a respectable fashion was the Bill Cosby show. You knew that he had rules and his children had to follow the rules. Also, you saw Bill Cosby and his TV wife work well together as parents.

My dear CWM sisters in Christ I have received emails from many of you who are frustrated that you have to work or your husband wants you to work outside the home. Many women have shared they cry about not being able to stay home with their children. We all come into marriage with expectations and those expectations are not always met. I think if your husband knows how unhappy you truly are about working he must feel he is letting you down and is not good enough for you. That can be a terrible burden to carry for him. Please do not hear me saying you need to suppress your feelings and get over it. That would be denying the facts. What I am saying is be careful about how you express your frustration to your husband. Make sure you let him know you appreciate how hard he works outside the home and inside the home. In your family you may be the sole breadwinner and your husband is a stay at home Dad. Make sure he knows you appreciate all the things he does to support the family.

I also realize as a CWM you can feel that no one appreciates all you do. I hear that and can understand that feeling well. Yet, as Christians we are told to build one another up and speak kind, gentle words. Our mates are not our enemies and they deserve our support. Honestly, men often don’t hear kind words at work or from friends.

Now, I am also aware that many of you are single parent Moms. The father of your child may not be supporting them financially or emotionally. You are in an extremely difficult situation and it can be overwhelming and frustrating. May I offer a few words of wisdom I have gained by being a therapist for over 25 years. Do not belittle or put down your child’s father in any way, no matter how lousy a father he has been. It is much better for your child to discover that on their own than to be repeatedly told by their Mom what a loser Dad is and has been. I know it stinks, but it may be years before your children totally realize the truth about their Dad. When they do learn the truth they will appreciate all you have done. God also sees and acknowledges all you do for your children.

Our entire society seems to be focused on putting others down rather than lifting one another up. As Christians we are called to bless one another. We are called to be different. We all could learn from Proverbs 16:24, “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” As CWMs let us be known for blessing our children, husband, and all those around us.

Final Thoughts

Take time at the dinner table for everyone to go around the table and share one thing they like about each member of the family. Your children may think it is stupid, but you will find out how your family members view one another. We can never encourage each other too much.

Till next time,

Kimberly M. Chastain

Kimberly M. Chastain, MS, LMFT is the Christian Working Mom Coach and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She is the author of The Voices of Christian Working Moms, 2 ebooks and an online Bible study. To find out how to receive coaching tips by email daily, go to http://www.kimberlychastain.com/cwmtips.htm. To find out more about her books go to www.christianworkingmom.com. For a free, initial coaching session send an email to free@kimberlychastain.com.