September 2013 CWM Interview
Welcome/Need Your Help
Interview
Final Thoughts


 

The Voices of Christian Working Moms

Newly Released Book
written by
Author Kimberly Chastain

Welcome/Need Your Help

Fall is here. Cooler weather and I’m always excited to see God’s handiwork when the trees change color. He is the perfect artist. I need more CWMs who are willing to be interviewed. If you are open to being interviewed, send an email to Kimberly@kimberlychastain.com with interview in the subject heading.
Thanks to Bettina and the wisdom she is sharing with us this month.

Bettina is a married 32 year old who lives in the United States. She has sons’ ages 8 ½ and 7, 4 year old twins – a boy and girl, and a 2 year old son. Bettina is a teacher, but chose to take a year off and stay home with her children.

The joys of being a Christian Working Mom are: I had so much joy in being a Christian Working Momma! I always felt guilty for working and was raised being taught that I should not be a working mom. I loved that I got to build so many relationships and have an impact on so many other lives as well as my own children. I am a very hard worker by nature and I felt it was important to give my kids the very best, yet I loved being able to serve as a teacher as well as serving my own family. I had always felt we just weren’t sacrificing enough if I kept working and was really caught up in the “legalistic” ways of looking at working vs. staying at home. I regret quitting my job as a teacher so much! I was very happy as a working mom and I now realize all of the blessings that it gave our family. I have struggled so much with wondering if I just have had the wrong attitude toward working all along. I used to be aggravated with my husband that I “had” to work when we first started having children. I now have learned how much God had his hand on us and I had a pure joy for what I did for a reason. I truly wish I hadn’t let the guilt get to me and would have focused on the positives all along. This has been a tough journey. I know you are not supposed to live with regrets, I am praying for God to use this time to help us grow as a family and couple. It seems we have many added stresses right now and I wish I would have realized that it was in fact “okay for me to be a working Christian mom”. In fact more than ‘okay’, God being in the center of my life is what is most important. I was serving others to and it was hard work, but I enjoyed every bit of it.

Bettina struggles as a Christian Working Mom in the following areas: I think the struggles for me were the pressures I felt that I “shouldn’t be working” and that we should just “sacrifice more”. I forgot that there were ways we already were sacrificing. I didn’t think that my family was suffering, but I felt “judged” or “looked down upon” for working and that many family members and church members felt I wasn’t giving my family what I needed to.

Favorite Bible Verse: “Do Not Grow Weary In Doing Good” – Galatians 6:9

What is God teaching you right now? To trust Him! That I don’t have to “live a certain way following rules or tradition” in order to be following Him. To find a peace and joy in what I do and use it for God’s glory. Not to compare myself or my family to others, because we are each created differently and what is best for one family or mom may not be what is best for another. Don’t judge others!

Words of Encouragement for other Christian Working Moms: Do not allow guilt to get you about working; if it’s because you ‘have to’ or because you ‘want to’. Don’t think “the grass looks greener on the other side”. Both paths are hard. Know yourself and your own family and husband. Decide for you what is best and don’t try to be a ‘people pleaser’. You will find that you are the best wife and mother when you are doing what you truly love. I think I didn’t allow myself to find the true joy in teaching, because I felt I was short-changing my own family. Focus on the positive and surround yourself with people who encourage you to be your best. Not those who tear you down or are negative!

Anything else you would like to share: God can use each stage of our lives to teach us something new. I wish that 10 years ago, I would have been able to see this from a different perspective. I wish I didn’t spend time being upset with my husband that I had to work, when I realize that I was at my best when I was in that role. Again, just keep seeing God and know that He will give you a peace for where you should be. Stay Positive, because every day you are being a servant to many people and it is a joy to be serving.

Bettina, I think you hit on an important point we need to learn to be content in all circumstances as Paul teaches in Philippians 4:11. Learning to be content is a process.

Final Thoughts

One of the joys of getting older is you don’t concern yourself as much about what others think about you. If you want to be a people pleaser, be a God pleaser first. Live your life for His glory alone.

Till next time,

Kimberly M. Chastain

Kimberly M. Chastain, MS, LMFT is the Christian Working Mom Coach and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She is the author of The Voices of Christian Working Moms, 2 ebooks and an online Bible study. To find out how to receive coaching tips by email daily, go to http://www.kimberlychastain.com/cwmtips.htm. To find out more about her books go to www.christianworkingmom.com. For a free, initial coaching session send an email to free@kimberlychastain.com.