September 2009 CWM Interview
Welcome/Prayer Partner
Blog/Online Bible Study
CWM Coaching Tips
Interview
Final Thoughts
Welcome/Prayer Partner

Welcome to all our new CWM sisters in Christ. I live in the Southeastern United States and we are getting drenched with rain right now. We desperately need the rain, but we are actually getting too much. You’re your weather is better wherever you are. One of the wonderful things we do in the CWM community is virtual prayer partners. The prayer partners share their requests by email and agree to pray for one another. I have a CWM requesting a prayer partner. If you are interested, please send an email to Kimberly@kimberlychastain.com and put prayer partner in the subject heading. Thanks in advance for your help.

Voices of Christian Working Moms

Blog/Online Bible Study

Visit the CWM blog at www.christianworkingmoms.blogspot.com and share whether or not you are the Human Post it Note in your family. I’m looking forward to hearing what you have to say. There are lots of good posts right now. I know lots of you read the blog, but very few of you share. Take a leap and join the conversation. The online Bible study has a new lesson posted about worship. You can visit the Bible study at http://cwmbiblestudy.blogspot.com.

CWM Coaching Tips

As a busy CWM do you find it hard to spend time studying God’s Word? Have a CWM tip emailed to you daily with one scripture to memorize a week. To find out more go to www.christianworkingmom.com/cwmtips.htm.

Interview

We have a special treat this month. Thelma Wells a well-known author and speaker shares her wonderful insights with us. I have heard Thelma speak before and she is encouraging, thoughtful, and humorous. She loves the Lord. Recently, Thelma and I talked by phone and she agreed to share her wisdom with us now that she is a grandmother and a great grandma as well. Over the years I begin to realize more and more that we can learn from our older sisters who have walked the path before us. Enjoy the interview. To find out more about Thelma you can visit her website at www.thelmawells.com.

First of all Thelma can you share with us what it was like for you when you were a CWM:

When I was working as a Christian Woman the challenges and strategies were similar to those today. I had three children who were involved in little league, dance, gymnastics, church, choir and school work. I was a banker by day and a banking teacher by night. My husband was a business man and my great grandmother lived with us. She was a blessing because she was able to be home with the children when we were not. However, the responsibility of being a mother was stressful because of time management issues. I had to either take the children to their respective activities or plan for them to go with reliable parents who were taking their children to the same place. Along with the children challenges I cleaned, cooked, washed, ironed and did everything to keep the family healthy and clean. Some of the strategies which include:

• Cooking a week’s menu of meals on one day of the week and preparing the meals in microwavable dishes that could be warmed for dinner every day.
• Doing the laundry every evening to keep it under control. Getting their clothes together for school and activities every evening (with the kids help)
• Implementing a schedule and routine for after school, study time, homework, incentive time (whether or not they get to watch television during the week, limiting their telephone talking time, and making sure they did their chores).
• Insisting on their help to keep up with their socks and shoes.
• Specific bed times and get up in the morning times.
• Making sure they ate breakfast every morning.
• And trying to get a little rest in the meantime.

What were the joys and what were the struggles of being a CWM?

The joys of being a Christian Working Woman are similar to those who don’t work. They are:

• Getting the household schedule to work most of the time.
• The children staying on schedule most of the time.
• Observing the children’s succeed in their activities.
• Listening to them say “Thank You” and seeing them practice courtesy and manners.
• The availability to sit down with them every Sunday and as often as possible during the week and eat together.
• Watching them relate to their dad especially on Sunday as we attended church, ate and had family time together.
• Being able to give clothes and a few things they enjoyed.

How many children do you have and what are their ages now?

I have three children and if I tell you their age one of them may not speak to me. Here’s a hint. They are all past 39 years old. Oh me, I’m in big trouble now!

What advice or words of encouragement would you give to CWM’s?

The advice I would give to CWM is to:

• Always be available for your children. Never get too tired or too busy for them to talk to you. If something shocks you, don’t overreact. Be cool so they will want to talk to you. Listen a lot and don’t be afraid to confront them when they are wrong and praise them when they are right. Never discipline them when you are angry and always let them know why you are disciplining them. Always keep your promises to them, their spirits are fragile.
• Find time for recreation or quiet time with them. Quality time is better than money or things. They want YOU not always what you can give them.
• Make Jesus Christ the priority in your lives. Going to church or religious services and activities are not options yet don’t nag them with the Bible, teach them to enjoy reading the Bible. You read it to them when they are young, allow them to read it to you when they are older.
• Prayer is essential in the home. Teach them to pray when they get up in the morning, before meals, as they study, when they have questions about relationships, when they are trying out for activities, etc. Also, teach them when things don’t work out like they want it to that it does not mean that God has not heard their prayer, He may be protecting them from something or going to give them their desire at a later date.
• Teach them to be nice to everybody but pick their friends. Always befriend someone who is doing the right things all the time. Sometimes the truth is that they may not have friends all the time because often when you do right you are lonely, but stand for right even if it means you stand by yourself. And, teach them to respect their teachers, elders and authority figures.

What is your favorite Bible verse currently?

Currently, my favorite verses are Ephesians 6:10-18, “10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

How do you think CWMs could support one another more?

I believe CWM’s can support each other more by:

* Praying with each other (conference calls)
* Recycling clothing and other useable items to each other in the same community by posting them on the computer or having a convenient exchange program in one of the homes or churches.
* Exchanging ideas about what works for them in regards to time-management and other issues.
* Organizing free recreation for the family like a picnic in the park, going to the city play ground, free concerts
* Carpooling with people who live in the same community
* People other than the parents being able to appropriately discipline the children and letting the children know that each parent approves
* Sharing recipes and meal planning ideas that takes only a few minutes
* Unify your efforts to teach the children the responsibility cleanliness and hygiene in the home and in the community.
* Investigating thoroughly who your children are friends with and what their parent’s activities are in the home before letting your children visit. If you see any trouble signs in your children or the children they associate with being open to talk to their parents about it in a loving and responsible way. It really does take a village. (Thelma, this is such an important point. I think most of us are afraid to tell another parent something we see as possible trouble with some else’s child).
* Teaching the children age appropriate morality, character building and integrity values as a group as well as individually.
What is God teaching you right now?

God is teaching me how to be a responsible grandmother to my nine grandchildren and three great grandchildren. These responsibilities include:

• Living a Christian life before them as an example of how a Christian Mother should live.
• Allow my adult children who are parents to be in charge of their families and give my advice only when asked unless there is an absolute necessity to intervene in their lives.
• Help the children when I want to and not all time when they want me to unless it is an emergency.
• Leave the lines of communication open for me with my children and their children so they feel comfortable in confiding in me.
• Complementing my children about the decision they make with their children.
• Sending my children cards, flowers or some kind of surprise every now and then to keep them motivated and inspired.
• Communicating with their father when they need help or advice to see what he recommends. I trust his wisdom.

Do you have one of your books in particular you would recommend for CWMs?

I would recommend my latest book, Don’t Give In – God Wants You To Win! because it gives strategies for fighting the good fight of faith and winning the battle over all the obstacles and stresses we experience.

Anything else you would like to share?

Everything I’ve talked about is soaked and saturated with LOVE. When you love your children you want the best for them. It’s not always easy but it is worth it. My great grandmother wisely said, “When your children are little they are on your lap. But when they get older they are on your heart! Children are a lifetime commitment. Let them trust you while you love them. That’s what Jesus would do!

Thelma, thanks so much for your many words of wisdom and encouragement. Your children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren have a wonderful treasure in you. You are truly a Godly woman.

Final Thoughts

Our society has become more and more isolated. It is important to be involved in the lives of children in our church and neighborhood. May we share the love of Jesus with all those around us.

Till next time,

Kimberly M. Chastain

Kimberly M. Chastain, MS, LMFT is the Christian Working Mom Coach and a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She is the author of The Voices of Christian Working Moms, 2 ebooks and an online Bible study. To find out how to receive coaching tips by email daily, go to http://www.kimberlychastain.com/cwmtips.htm. To find out more about her books go to www.christianworkingmom.com. For a free, initial coaching session send an email to free@kimberlychastain.com.